Last night I was craving tuna noodle casserole. It was a very specific craving too, not just a hankering for something soft and comfortable. I wanted egg noodles, frozen peas, Campbell’s cream of something soup, salty and tender canned fish, cheddar cheese and crispy browned bread crumbs. ALL IN ONE MOTHERTRUCKING BITE. I have not had tuna noodle casserole in decades either. But I knew exactly what it should taste like, how it should smell and how it should look; the taste and texture of every ingredient distinctive and exacting.
My mom used to feed her siblings and father casseroles like the tuna noodle one I so deeply craved. Mom was given a pittance of a budget and was expected to shop and cook for her brother, sister and father by the age of 9. She made a lot of casseroles; a lot of casseroles made from cans. What a smart girl. I remember her telling me that she had never seen a fresh mushroom until she moved to California at the age of 19. She had only ever before seen or had them canned. She and her family had most if not all of their vegetables from a can. Peas, green beans, corn and mushrooms all became the basis for many a casserole. Add to the can arsenal Cambell’s soups (Cream of asparagus, cream of mushroom, cream of celery, cream of chicken, cream of tomato) and you’re halfway there (and what a fortuitous marketing coup Campbell’s has pulled off over the decades by making an unappetizing soup an integral part of thousands of recipes American’s use every day. Hat’s off to those geniuses!). My mom’s beaten and oh so well used copy of the Betty Crocker Cookbook has an astounding number of recipes in it that call for canned products. And that is a legitimate cookbook and a real historic record of the American diet. But back to the casserole; cheese or other dairy products often find their way in the mix. Casserole recipes frequently call for cottage cheese, cream cheese, sour cream or béchamel sauce. For a casserole, any protein will do (or no protein, mac and cheese is a casserole too!). Ground beef, sausage, seafood, spam, canned fish, leftover roast ends, chicken, ham; anything you may have on hand will do nicely in a casserole. Add a starch and you’ve got a complete meal to will fill hungry tummies and a variety of appetites. And of course, the piece de resistance to any good casserole is whatever crispy brown topping you have chosen. One can top that bad boy with any number of things; delicate toasted bread crumbs, a buttery cracker, flaky pastry, something salty like fried onions or potato chips, Fritos or, as The Joy of Cooking’s tuna noodle recipe calls for, “buttered corn flakes”. Doesn’t that sound divine?! As a bonus, you will be able to eat your casserole again (and maybe even a third time) as casserole is best made in quantity and there should always be leftovers. Leftover casserole is maybe even better isn’t it? Just don’t microwave it, PLEASE! Reheat it in the oven, for the love of casserole. What other dish emphasizes economy, variety, creativity and crave-ability so well? In fact, I can think of no other food that represents us as a nation better. Like America, a casserole if more than the sum of its parts.
The offering of a casserole is a loving act. It says “I want you to be satisfied in at least this one small way”. It’s why we make them for loved ones when we wish to unburden them. Have a new baby and can’t cook? Here’s a Casserole! Have you been sick or in the hospital? Casserole! Have you lost somebody dear to you? Here’s another Casserole! Simply having a hard time coping with life at the moment? I care about you, here’s a casserole! Cooked, transported, served and reheated in a single dish, a casserole says “take it easy, I got this.”
By the time my mom was making casseroles for me, she had refined her cooking skills and the quality and breadth of ingredients increased exponentially. Cans were replaced by fresh vegetables. “Exotic” ingredients such as curry and salsa found their way into the mix. And like my mom, as I’ve become a better cook, I’ve refined by own casserole making even further. I never could abide by those “cream of soups”, they taste great once mixed into a dish but the gelatinous mass that’s comes sucking its way out of the can turns me right off. I prefer to use fresh ingredients at every step (when applicable, I’d never turn my back on buttered corn flakes, never!). It’s not too difficult to make a basic béchamel or gravy from scratch as a substitute to those overly salty processed soups. For me, casserole is a dish of inspiration. It’s something I make when I don’t feel like going to the store. I look and see what in the refrigerator needs to be used up and let that be my guide.
All that said, a casserole is not bombproof. I have seen some horrible things done to casserole. Following are some of the most common sins against the ‘role.
#1: Mushy texture. There is nothing worse that a mouthful of mush, unless you are Miss Muffet. Make sure whatever starch you use is on the al dente side of things before you assemble your dish. Remember that it still has to cook long enough to crisp the topping/melt the cheese and your starch is going to absorb some of the binder. It’s supposed to!
#2: Dry ass casserole. This happens when you don’t add enough liquid or binder. This is tricky to judge before you bake because of the absorption issue (see above). If in doubt, err on the side of more binder, making sure your starch is not overcooked.
#3: Pale soggy topping. Make sure you give your casserole ample time to do it’s thing. Even it your ingredients are already “cooked”, they still need time to marry. Don’t rush the honeymoon! A low oven (325) should ensure slow even browning.
#4: Nasty burnt topping. If this happens you probably rushed it, had your oven on too high or forgot that you were cooking altogether! Use a timer set for 10 minutes before you think it should be done and check your casserole frequently. Toppings with a high fat content will also burn fast, faster than you can imagine. If using a high-fat topping (buttered cornflakes, I’m looking at you!) cover your casserole with foil for the first 15 minutes or so and brown only at the end of your cooking time.
Casserole is great is so many ways. As humble as is, as basic, brown, repeated and reheated as it may be, casserole should always be delicious and satisfying.
So, back to my craving, I didn’t have any tuna in the house. But I had some Bratwurst, so I made a casserole out of that!
Inspiration ingredient : Bratwurst
Casserole: Hofbrau Hottie:
Recipe:
Brats, (2 or 3)
1 onion, diced
1 clove garlic, minced
½ head of cabbage (red or green), cored and chopped
1 tsp paprika
A dash or two of Worchester sauce
Salt
Pepper
½ cup beer
2 cups milk
2-3 tbs flour
2 tbs butter
4 tbs whole grain mustard
1 cup grated swiss/gruyere sharp cheddar or other equally punchy cheese
1 package egg noodles, cooked al dente
2 cups fresh bread crumbs
Brown sausages. My brats were pre-cooked so I sliced them first and browned them in olive oil. If you are lucky enough to have some fresh brats, use those! I would pierce them a couple of times with a knife and brown them whole and then slice them later after they are thoroughly cooked through and rested.
Add onion and then garlic to the browning pan. Add paprika, Worcester, salt and pepper. Saute until translucent and just starting to brown, deglaze pan with beer. Add cabbage and simmer until done (you may need to add some water to the pan if it gets too dry). Add back your sausage, set aside.
Melt butter in a large sauce pan. Once foaming add flour and mix well. Fry flour in the butter for about 5 minutes. Slowly whisk in milk until you have achieved consistency. Bring to a low simmer. Add mustard and whisk in. Add grated cheese a bit at a time (leaving and handful for the top) while continuously whisking. Once cheese is incorporated, taste for seasoning. Add whatever you think it needs.
In a big pot (probably the one you boiled the noodles in) mix noodles and sausage/cabbage mixture. Spread into your largest casserole pan. Evenly pour sauce over mixture, squishing it all up in there. Sprinkle the rest of the cheese and then add your breadcrumbs. Cook in a 325 oven until you are satisfied with the degree of browning on your crumbs and your casserole has had time to settle. About 20 minutes.
Note: The final dish, while delicious, lacked some acidity. If I made this again I think I’d add some sauerkraut to the onion and cabbage mixture, being sure to let it cook down a bit. I think that would do nicely.
Another note: Next time I’ll take some pictures.
Last note, promise: Any casserole memories you’d like to share? Favorite recipes or thoughts on the theme? Please leave them in the comments!
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But the smell was intoxicating. It emanated just the most fragrant, floral-tropical aroma. It tasted not nearly as good as it smelled, bitter and quite sour. We guessed it was a passion fruit. There was a similar but not identical creeper on the fence. That flower was one of those crazy alien looking things you see sometimes. 
The fruit on this vine was hard and green. We guessed a different kind of passion fruit. Well, we are a smart bunch because I looked that shit up online and we were right! One is a Yellow Passion Fruit and the other is a Purple Passion Fruit. Last week, inspired by the robed oldies, it checked the YPF and noticed that there were many fully ripe looking fruits so I picked them. A few had fallen to the ground and were completely hollowed out. Some neighborhood critter must eat them. It’s like a little Wild Kingdom right out my window! I tasted one and it was still too bitter to eat but the flavor and smell were too fresh and pleasing to waste. I decided to make Passion Fruit syrup. I have NO idea what made me think to do this. I have a secret desire to be like Julia fucking Child I guess. 
I really had no clue how one goes about making this but I took a chance and winged it (wung it?). I opened the fruits and scraped out the pulp into a saucepan. I added some water, sugar, and a little vanilla. I brought it to a boil and then added some vermouth, because Julia always seems to add some kind of booze to everything and its what I had on hand. I lowered the temp and simmered it for a while. Then I strained it. It tasted damn good! A bit tart, very aromatic and passion fruity! I didn’t know what to do with it then so I put it in the fridge. Later in the week I used it on vanilla ice cream, made an Italian soda with San Pellegrino, and made a vodka cocktail. All were delish! 
: Toxic soil test in progress, do not eat, may be harmful to humans and animals” or something like that. It is a very professional sign, its dated, has the intersection written in, and is all governmental in looks and attitude. I’m like what gives? Why there? Is there something the city needs to let us know? Is this really how they test the soil, with tomaters? The maters are big and lovely looking. I had my suspicions. THEN, yesterday I see my neighbor picking some and I’m like, AHA, I knew it. Nicely played Elmo, nicely played. His name is Elmo, by the way, how cute is that? I remembered that once when collectively, we as neighbors sharing recycle bins were remiss in our sorting diligence. There was paper in the glass bin, glass in the plastic bin, it was a mess. The city wouldn’t collect our recycling for almost a month. Then Elmo took it upon himself to go out and resort everybody’s stuff. After, we were all presented with printouts detailing the RIGHT way to recycle and gently reprimanding us. For the record, I was not the one mixing; it was the hippies next door. Anyhow, it makes perfect sense now. Elmo must know about the hunter/gatherers, the oldies and whoever else might want to steal his lovely tomatoes. 
