{"id":20,"date":"2007-08-16T12:54:24","date_gmt":"2007-08-16T19:54:24","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/babychoby.com\/?p=20"},"modified":"2007-08-16T12:54:24","modified_gmt":"2007-08-16T19:54:24","slug":"viva-cuba-cuba-gooding-jr-america%e2%80%99s-bravest-actor","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/babychoby.com\/?p=20","title":{"rendered":"Viva Cuba! Cuba Gooding, Jr.: America\u2019s Bravest Actor"},"content":{"rendered":"

<\/font><\/p>\n

With the recent opening of the dismally reviewed Daddy Day Camp (2% on the tomato meter. If you don\u2019t know what that is, it\u2019s this (<\/font>http:\/\/www.rottentomatoes.com\/m\/daddy_day_camp\/?critic=columns<\/font><\/a>), Cuba Gooding Jr., in my opinion, has become America\u2019s Bravest Actor. In a show of complete disregard for his reputation as a serious actor (please lets not forget that he is an Academy Award winner) Cuba has forged a career by picking what are surely some of THE WORST scripts being green-lit from an increasingly asinine pool of bullshit constituting a show of courage befitting a true visionary. Remember a time when Cuba was a fresh face and a real talent, beginning with Boyz N The Hood and A Few Good Men? No? Have your memories of the man who stole our hearts with the catchphrase of the 90\u2019s \u201cShow me the money\u201d faded and been replaced by shuttering thoughts of farting dogs and minstrel shows? You are not alone, yet Cuba forges on. Damn the critics, damn the movie going public, damn self respect and damn logic, Cuba Gooding Jr. is a shining beacon of mediocrity, heralding an era of profound apathy, pandering and banality! And to this, I say, congratulations Mr. Gooding. You have\u00a0verily solidified yourself as America\u2019s Bravest Actor. If you doubt my assertion, I submit the following as evidence. Here is The Best of The Worst:<\/font><\/p>\n

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<\/p>\n

Daddy Day Camp<\/em><\/strong>, a remake of the ok Daddy Day Care<\/font><\/p>\n

In which: Cuba plays Eddie Murphy, gets puked on and presumably receives multiple\u00a0tiny footed kicks to the groin. Costars: A guy who is not Jeff Garlin and a troupe of atrocious child actors.<\/font><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\"Not<\/font><\/p>\n

Norbit<\/em><\/strong>, an Eddie Murphy Extravaganza<\/font><\/p>\n

In which: Cuba is one of the few characters not playing Eddie Murphy. This one features fat suits, misogyny and the most offensive \u201coriental\u201d characature since Mickey Rooney in Breakfast at Tiffany\u2019s.<\/font><\/p>\n

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\"Don't<\/font><\/p>\n

Radio<\/strong><\/em>, \u201cspecial needs\u201d tearjerker<\/font><\/p>\n

In which: Cuba\u2019s portrays Radio, a mentally challenged man who\u00a0overcomes some odds and tugs on some heartstrings. You know, Rudy, but more retarded. I have only seen the trailer for this and when I did, the theater broke out into spontanious laughter in all the wrong (right?) places. <\/font><\/p>\n

\"Oh<\/font><\/font><\/p>\n

Boat Trip<\/strong><\/em>, a \u201cdrag\u201d on the high seas<\/font><\/p>\n

In which: Cuba goes on a gay cruise and pretends to love cock in order to get laid by a woman. Three\u2019s Company type high jinks ensue.\u00a0 <\/span>Features: a lot of snapping and \u201cyou go girl\u201d and \u201coh no he didn\u2019t\u201d. I ask, when did the gays start acting like sassy black TV neighbors? <\/font><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\"Don't\u00a0<\/font><\/p>\n

Snow Dogs<\/em><\/strong>, a fish out of water “tail”<\/font><\/p>\n

In which: Cuba, a Miami dentist, is the reluctant inheritor of a sled dog team. The dogs feature weird CGI faces so they can wink and give knowing, conspiratorial looks to one another as they teach this city slicker a lesson or two. Features: lots of yellow snow and shots to the groin.<\/font><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\"TCBY?\"<\/font><\/p>\n

Chill Factor<\/strong><\/em>, you know, like Speed but different!<\/font><\/p>\n

In which: Cuba teams up with a Johnny Depp impersonator doing a Keanu Reeves impersonation to save the world from rogue military officer with a vaporizing bomb. Instead of a bus our buddies get an ice cream truck and they must keep the bomb under 50 degrees, OR ELSE. <\/font><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

One can only wonder what he\u2019s do next. I really don\u2019t know how much lower a man can sink without having the taint of scandal to excuse his downward spiral. I\u2019d understand perhaps if he had been caught with his proverbial pants down in some splashy media frenzy, but no, he seems like a decent enough guy. No drugs, no hookers, not even a hint of scandal. Yet our brave soldier keeps saying yes! Yes to it all! He can\u2019t even be getting paid that much, can he? I don\u2019t think any of his recent outings can be considered hits.\u00a0 I have presumed a lot\u00a0about the\u00a0preceding movies, having only actually seen one of them (can you guess which?).\u00a0I don’t beleive I am alone in this. So, in the face of ridicule and marginal profitability, Cuba continues his valiant shock and awe campaign and takes it in the nuts as America\u2019s Bravest Actor. <\/font><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

With the recent opening of the dismally reviewed Daddy Day Camp (2% on the tomato meter. If you don\u2019t know what that is, it\u2019s this (http:\/\/www.rottentomatoes.com\/m\/daddy_day_camp\/?critic=columns), Cuba Gooding Jr., in my opinion, has become America\u2019s Bravest Actor. In a show … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-20","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/babychoby.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/babychoby.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/babychoby.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/babychoby.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/babychoby.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=20"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/babychoby.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":119,"href":"https:\/\/babychoby.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20\/revisions\/119"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/babychoby.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=20"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/babychoby.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=20"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/babychoby.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=20"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}